**twistedtrins

Silver Lining...

My boy charles and I got back together, just last Saturday. At first I was still somehow doubting his intentions of asking me back, guess somewhere along that relationship of ours, both our trust was broken. =(

It was quite hard the first few days, we were still pointing fingers at each other on who's to blame why the relationship ended like that... but we got over it after a day or two.

Yesterday was amazing. We spent the whole day and night together. Went to watch Resident Evil and ate dinner at Shabu2, then went home afterwards, played strip poker... (which I won!!! =p) and made love and cuddled till dawn. What I can't get outta' my head is that when we were sleeping (he thought I was) he kissed me and said "ILOVEYOUSOMUCH". It was like music to my ears.

It wasn't what we did that made yesterday special for me, it was that we were together and had fun just being with each others company.

breathe***

I am just so crestfallen... sigh! somehow still longing for that person I thought would be the last.. still thinking about what happened.. how come the relationship suddenly went from perfect to a disaster.

I know what the answer is, I'm just still denying the fact that my relationship got fucked up because of our pride, and that I did nothing to save it.. well, I did guess it's just not enough.

People sometimes forget that pride  gets us nowhere, or that it won't give us anything good. It will just make everything worst.

Whatever it is I don't think it as a bad slice... I was given something special... no words could ever describe.

losing hope....

How can someone you've given your whole trust break it just like that? Someone you thought you can trust your life with, how can that one person that made you happy and complete is the same person who would lie to you and hurt you so much?

I've been in and out of relationships, believing everytime that it's the last... but every single time, it's disappointment after another disappointment. I am the kind of person who can get over anything or anyone just like that but don't get me wrong, When I say I'm inlove or that i'm really into a guy, I really am, it's just that when I see something wrong, I tend to back off right away... (well, that's now, not before, believe me I try to stay in a relationship thinking that the other person would change but in the latter I learned that I shouldn't suffer just because of the other party, that's not how love works).

Love is being honest even if it's going to hurt you or your partner like hell (it's better than finding it out from another person).

There are certain things that I've learned along the path that I took... hope this will be a help to other peeps...

Speak now or forever hold your peace is very, very true. I mean it's better to speak up right away about something that's bothering you. Holding back your true feelings leads straight to resentment, which can harm a relationship over time, no matter how strong it is.

Don't look outside a relationship when you should be nurturing and working on it, I mean we all know that relationships are hard work, but are a lot more fulfilling than whatever physical or emotional band-aid you are considering.

Just because you're in a relatioship, doesn't mean that you aren't on your best behavior. Give thanks and respect where it's due, whether your partner just ran a small errand for you or is offering you full support through a difficult patch. Gratitude and appreciation go a long way.

Don't try and control one another and always respect one another -- youll have a much happier union.

If you would'nt want them to do it to you, don't do it to them. Pretty simple, but everyone seems to forget it too often.

For goodness sakes, have sex. A sexless relationship is a doomed relationship. Have happy sex. Have make-up sex. Have mad sex. Do it even when you don't want to, and watch how close you become. There is no fuss having sex with someone you love wont fix.

Be a decent human being. Hold their hand and surprise them with something they love every so often for no reason at all.

Dont try to be right, try to make things right. If you mess up, admit it, accept it and work to make things better. Egos stay single forever. (I don't know about this one, hell I don't know why I wrote this, but damn if you're right, you're right!!! hehehe, that's my pride talking.)

The key to any relationship is communication -- good dialog, being understanding and addressing concerns and issues as a team. Also, maintaining self respect will help your inner-self grow stronger, and will help in all aspects of your personal, love and even work life.

What I've learned best along that thorny road is that you have to put the relationship first. Its not only your life anymore.

Funny how I can just go all day long and give advices to other people when I, couldn't seem to help myself. Sad but true. =(

relationships.... sheeesh!

I made "tampo" to my sweety a while ago... (or was it me being a green-eyed monster because of jealousy?) I hanged up on him... and din't answer his calls!(until now!) *drama queen*

well here's why, for the past... say two weeks, his ex keeps callin' him askin' him for things.. uhm mainly favors and questions(if you could call it that). At first I was like ok, no biggie!just laughed it off! even if that what's-her-face asked him to sleep over her place (see!!? I wasn't just being a brat!). But the second time.. I was already going gaga...(grrrr!!!) still, I composed myself and told him "Well sweety, it's up to you. You're already big enough to make the right decisions and I trust you." (haha! If he only knew how crazy I was feeling inside!) The third time, which was a while ago... another favor from little-miss-selfish-bitch.. and I just don't understand why he still has to talk to his ex who, according to him is a pathetic loser and made his life miserable and that the only reason he went out with her was because she was a piteous creature and has nowhere to turn to?? And Why does this girl won't stop it?? Sheesh! get a life dahlin' don't be such a big "B".

Don't get me wrong, It's ok to talk to your ex even be good friends with them, I mean my best guy bud is my ex for pete's sake but not like that... asking him to sleep at your place knowing that the guy already has a girlfriend, that is just incredibly low-down unethical!

I am not being possessive... nuh uh! this is me just trying to make him understand that it has to stop. Oh c'mon! Is it that hard to be a little sensitive to your partner's feelings?? I mean I know for a fact that if this is the other way around he would be bothering me about it or he would constantly say asinine things because of that...(believe me, I would never hear the end of it!) so why can't he just for a second put his feet in my shoes and just tell her to back off??!!

What makes me so mad is that when he already new the first time that the girl is bad news to this relationship of ours, why does he still talk to her? are guys really that insecure that they have to make us feel so bad just to make them feel better? Do they really think that by doing these things we would love them more??? well, I do hope not... I really do hope not!

I hafta go out!!!

Shleped along with my boy last Sunday to his airsoft game, which he has been buggin' me to try but being the girly girl that I am and I didn't want to be hit by those small thingy (bb's according to my boy) I made him a deal, I'll go with him but I won't be playing. When we got there we ate lunch (I cooked our lunch by the way! =p I just hafta say that), waited a few minutes (or was that hours?)for the other players to arrive, I was having a babble with mich (his boss' wife) she told me that I was in for a boring day if I'm not going to play, And I was like "oh, it's ok! I brought a book with me and I get bruises easily plus I have asthma..."  gave everyone all the excuses I could think of. The jocular thing was, when they started getting their garbs on, (it was kinda' cute... I mean the masks and gloves and all the things that goes with the whole outfit...plus the guns) I suddenly wanted to play so I said yes right away when Charles told me that there was an extra pants... boots, well everything. Finally the first 15min. game started and I was like  "sweety, where do I stay? what do I do? " sheesh, what an annoying girlfriend! So, I got stuck in one place, so scared to be shot at that I didn't even bother moving, almost lost it when a bug just decided to crawl on my arms, good thing I remembered I was with charles' bosses and colleagues so I was able to keep it together until the game ended (just imagine how embarassing that would be for him). Then came the 2nd game... what happened? go figure... I just stayed in one place 'til the game ended... but after that, I didn't want to be called "maarte" and all that and hell why did I even wore all those stuff if I'm not going to move my ass and be such a party pooper.. so when we started to play again, I tried to move forward, pulled the trigger... (which was way fun!) moved forward to the other side... then... I got hit... so much for being brave! hahaha! but I had fun.. way better than staying at one place- it gets really boring that way! Then the games after that my boy Charles was like "sweety, enough na, you might get exhausted." And I was Like "No sweety, I still want to play." Airsoft is really fun... I mean even if it makes you sweat like crazy - which makes you look like hell and the clothes makes you feel so unglamorous plus shouting "I got hit, I'm going out"  is really so uhm not nice in the ears but it is really something that you can do with your boy or friends and bond like crazy. You can go in your fantasy world and imagine you're Demi Moore on G.I. Jane. It's also good for couples who are like cats and dogs (they can shoot each other as much as they like and just say, I gotcha! =p and not feel guilty about it.) Definitely going to play again. winky*wink*wink*

All about life and everything that comes with it...

Was out Saturday night with my girls nicole and genevire.. damn!? I never realized until that moment when we're all together how much fun it is to go out with just your girlfriends on a gimik. Let me tell you why, when your with your girlfriends you can laugh like godzilla and hell they'll just laugh some more... you'll be up to date with what's happenin' with almost every single person that you know on this planet... hahaha! you know what I mean... "girlfriends = gossip", There will be no awkward-moments-I-wanna-disappear-right-now situations,  You can get drunk like crazy and know that you're safe and nobody'll be takin' advantage of you afterwards, you can whine all night long about being fat and losing weight and get lots of advices from your girls... you can look and drool over super hot guys that passes by and no one will think you're a bitch and this are just a few things on why going out with your girlfriends are super fun. wink***wink**